Following
his pleasant discovery earlier in the day, Hueze Huesu, in his 50s,
couldn’t wait to get home later that night. He felt like a school boy
preparing for a first date. He was excited about exploring the world of
séx with a ‘rubber.’
“Nobody
had told me about condóms until I heard from some people that it
prevents pregnancy and séxually transmitted diseases,” he said. However,
his excitement was deflated when he tried to explore…
He wanted to enjoy his new discovery with one of his wives t night.
He said, “For the first time, I tried to use it when I wanted to sleep
with my wife but she bluntly refused. She said she was not a prostitute
and queried why I wanted to use a condóm when we have been married for
years and never used one.”
Since then, Huese, who has 10 children, has never tried to use a
condóm with any of his two wives. “I have never believed in the use of
condóms anyway. This has not stopped me from having séx regularly. The
woman knows the sign when the man is about to release or reach climax.
So she has already even enjoyed it more than the man before he
withdraws,” noted Huese animatedly.
The use of condóms is strange to men in Makoko, a densely populated
slum town in Lagos where majority live in wooden shacks built on water.
Like Huese, many Egun people in Makoko, as well as Oko-Agbon and
Ago-Egun communities in Yaba Local Council Development Area, Lagos, do
not like using condóms due to their long held traditional belief in the
old practice of coitus interruptus, also known as the withdrawal or
pull-out method during séxual intercourse.
For centuries, this has been used as a method of birth control worldwide.
The history is not lost on the Egun people whose forefathers migrated
from neighbouring Francophone West African countries like Togo and
Benin Republic, as well as from Badagry, Lagos. This age old practice
has been transferred to the current generation, where most of the people
speak their local Egun dialect and sometimes French. Their major
occupations are fishing and farming. Only a few understand English and
the residents, whose maj live in wooden shacks built on murky waters
oozing with an unpleasant odour.
“The use of condóm means nothing for us here as Egun people. We don’t
like using condóms because we know ourselves, both women and men; we
don’t go outside or sleep around. It’s those people who go outside
sleeping with different people that contact such diseases like HIV,”
said Lowato Luke, one of the traditional chiefs in the area.
Luke, who has two wives and 12 children, gleefully boasted that he
had mastered the withdrawal method and understands his wives’ ovulation
cycles. “I know the particular times to have séx with my wives, even if
they are breastfeeding and I want to have séx with them, I know how to
do it to prevent another pregnancy,” he said. Like Huese, he also
claimed that his wives enjoy the séx more than he does. “But if you use
condóm, it won’t be that enjoyable. I have never used a condóm,” he
noted.
It is the same case with Kirianko Goi, in his 40s. “I don’t believe
in the use of condóm because I never heard that from my father. It’s not
for me to say whether I will advise my children to use condóm or not.
If the young boys and girls want to have séx, they won’t tell you. This
generation is clearly different from that of my father and mine. But if
I’m in a position to do so, I will advise them, it is my duty to advise
them,” he said.
Goi’s nephews, two young men in their 20s, one married and the other
unmarried, giggled intermittently during their uncle’s brief condóm
talk. But they declined comments when asked if they use condóms during
séx.
Many of the men who spoke to our correspondent in the community
expressed their aversion to the use of condóms during séxual intercourse
and were insistent that their women enjoyed it that way.
Twenty-five-year-old Bernadette Sato, who has two children, agreed.
She does not like condóm. “We don’t like using condóm. But if we don’t
want to get pregnant, we know how to do it by ourselves; it pays us more
that way, because we don’t like using condóm. I was told in a hospital
in Cotonou, Benin Republic, where I gave birth to my first child, that
people who don’t want to get pregnant can use condóm. Sometimes, I use a
family planning drug before and after séx with my husband to prevent
pregnancy,” she said, noting that many of her friends also don’t like
condóms, while some claimed it could bring about disease. “I don’t know
the type of disease, but I just don’t like condóm during séx,” she
added.
Pipi Olorunwa, who has been married for 12 years and has six
children, gave an insight into the female perspective. She said:
“Although there is no official report that says condóm is bad;
personally, I don’t like it because God did not create it. Those who
created it did so because of the level of immorality in the world today
so that they can enjoy themselves. There are several methods to avoid
pregnancy. A couple can have séx without the wife conceiving.
“I also don’t like the chemical and odour from condóm because I
believe the chemicals used in preserving the condóm could cause problems
and is harmful to the body. Although I didn’t get the information from a
medical expert, but everybody does according to their belief. I don’t
use any drug either to prevent pregnancy. I just do it the natural way
with my husband.”
“We don’t use need it or any other contraceptive because we
understand how to do child spacing,’’ noted the head of the traditional
chiefs in the area, 55-year-old Mr. Francis Agoyon Alashe. When probed
further, he gave a timeline of the spacing among some of his 14 children
as proof. It showed a two or three-year gap among them. “My children
are well spaced. Some of them, including the twins, were born in 1984,
1986 and 1989. I stopped having children in 2003,” he explained, adding
that he still had séx with his wives during those period without
childbirth because he had ‘planned it carefully with the withdrawal
method.’
“Of course, the woman enjoys it. It’s a matter of agreement between
the man and the woman. We don’t like using condóms as such because we
want flesh to meet flesh. If a man is too anxious during séx, he will
release on time, but if he can control his excitement, he can take
longer minutes,” he explained.
According to Agoyon, the use of condóms could even have ‘negative
effects.’ “We believe using condóm could bring disease on its own. This
could happen when the sperm goes back into the manhood. We call it
‘foon’. Then, to urinate will be very difficult,” he said
However, a medical doctor, Dr. Kareem Jamiu, punctured holes in
Agoyon’s statement. “That’s not true. It’s not medically possible. But
there is what is called ‘retrograde ejaculation’, where the sperm goes
backwards to the bladder instead of forward. Normally, when a man wants
to release, the bladder neck closes so that the sperm can easily flow
forward. But if the bladder neck muscles are weak or relaxed, then it
means there is a problem. Some causes of retrograde ejaculations are
complications from diabetes, a malfunctioning bladder sphincter, as well
as some STDs. But in a normal male, the bladder neck is normally so
tight and so the sperm cannot go back,” explained Jamiu, who once worked
with the Doctors Without Borders/Médecins Sans Frontières during their
intervention programme in Makoko, Oddo and Badia communities in Lagos
State.
The MSF team, comprised foreign doctors supported by Nigerian medical
staff, worked in these areas for over two years and established a
health centre, until they left in 2012.
Despite the lack of information, knowledge, and awareness about the
consequences of unprotected séx, there is a general low rate of STDs and
HIV/AIDS in the Makoko communities, noted Jamiu, who confirmed to our
correspondent that the people in the communities really don’t like using
condóms.
He said: “We tried talking with them but it was difficult getting the
message across to them. When you tell them about it, they just laugh
about it and say they will try.
